HotchxReid Drabbles
by Amy494walker
Summary: Various short Hotch/Reid drabbles. PG-13/K
1. Chapter 1

**4 Short Hotch/Reid Drabbles**

**Disclaimer:** Not mine, no profit made.

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><p><strong>Title: <strong>Body Paint

**Rating: **PG-13

**Prompt:** : Hotch/Reid, body painting.

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><p>"I look about as ridiculous as I feel." Aaron moaned, looking in the mirror.<p>

Returning from the bathroom in a Superman costume with a fresh tub of paint mix, Spencer sighed, "Of course you look ridiculous, I'm not finished. You're blotchy."

"Yeeaah," Aaron replied, "Blotchy, that must be it." and looked at Spencer over his bare, green shoulder with a look pleading for pity, "Can't I go as Bruce Banner?"

Frowning and grunting in frustration, Spencer cried, "For the millionth time! You. Are NOT The Hulk! You are the Martian Manhunter! Why is that so hard to remember?"

"Because I'm green and wearing purple!" Replied Aaron, exasperated.

Spencer closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose, "You're wearing blue, not purple and it's a cape, not torn shorts." he said, sounding like he was on the verge of snapping.

Crossing his painted arms over his 'blotchy' chest, Aaron replied, "No-bodies gonna know the difference."

"It's a Comic Book Convention!" Spencer yelled, "EVERY-BODIES going to know the difference."

"Why do you get to be Superman?" Aaron asked, feeling not unlike a petulant child.

"Because I called it." His lover whined in response. As the words left his mouth, Spencer's face fell, his shoulders sagged and he exhaled deeply, muttering "I'm an adult FBI agent. What am I doing?"

Instantly feeling bad, Aaron reached out to his partner only to have him move away. "Spencer, I was just being a jerk."

"No, no. I was being unreasonable. I don't know what I'm doing, I've never been interested in these conventions before. If you really want to leave, we can. It's fine." Spencer seemed really upset at himself, and that just wouldn't do.

"Spence, baby. There's nothing to be ashamed of. I love how enthusiastic you got about this. I do want to go to the convention, because of you. I love seeing you immersed in something you love." he said, smiling, "It's not because of an interest in Comics, I was much more into coin collecting as a kid."

A teasing smirk made it's way onto Spencer's face as he mumbled, "Coins? Nerd."

Laughing and grabbing his lover, Aaron chuckled, "Oh is that so Superman?"

"Aaron!" Spencer cried, giggling and wriggling in his arms, "You're getting paint all over my costume."

Holding on and planting small kisses all over the squirming man, Aaron said, "So, you said Superman and the Martian Manhunter where friends right?"

Struggling to breath though laughs, Spencer said, "Yeah ….. but I don't think they …. made out."

"How do you know?" Aaron said lasciviously and tackled his, laughing, superhero boyfriend to their shared bed.

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><p><strong>Title:<strong> Fuller

**Rating** - PG-13

**Prompt: **Hotch/Reid, when Hotch realises Reid's pants have gotten tighter.

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><p>He had to be imagining it. He had known Spencer Reid for many years and he had always been the scrawny, awkward kid. The sight before him had to either be his own imagination or an imposter.<p>

Because Hotch could simply not handle living in a world where Reid had an ass that amazing.

Where the hell had it come from? Was it the pants? Had he started getting his pants fitted? No, there was no cut of trousers that could hide a backside like that for 8 years.

Aaron thought more about it and realized that it wasn't just the contents of his pants that had changed, Reid as a whole had filled out, both physically and emotionally. Looking at him now, Aaron could no longer see the too-skinny and shy kid he used to.

The man stood before him now was exactly that, a man.

_'A sexy man.' _Hotch's thoughts chimed in.

Shaking his head, he tried hard to push those thoughts from his mind. He was Reid's boss and it was highly inappropriate for him to be thinking this way.

So it was much to his dismay that his gaze kept creeping back to his subordinates hot ass as the other man was analyzing the geographical profile for the case they were working.

_'Even if you could possibly consider the idea of a relationship with a member of the team, a male member no less, he probably wouldn't even want you.'_

That thought allowed Hotch a small amount of comfort even as it stung. Yeah, it was a bit harsh of his mind to taunt him like that, but it was true. As long as he was secure in the knowledge that Reid would never share his desire, he could handle this new and sudden crush.

At that moment, Reid turned and much to Hotch's embarrassment, caught his boss staring at his ass.

What Hotch had not being expecting was for Reid's eyes to light up, his mouth to curl into a smirk and for him to flick out his tongue to wet his full lips.

Holding his gaze for a few more moments, Reid soon cleared his throat and turned back to the map on the wall, making no move what so ever to keep Hotch from checking him out some more.

There was only one thing of which the Unit Chief was sure of at that moment.

He was screwed.

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><p><strong>Title:<strong> Nine or Ten?

**Rating:** PG-13

**Prompt:** H/R/any female character— at Comic-Con dressed as (choice of Star Trek, Dr. Who, Merlin, or mixed)

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><p>Hotch knew why he was here, he had made the grave mistake of actually betting against his poker-cheating-and-yes-he-cheated-and-that's-that lover. But what he couldn't figure out was how Prentiss had gotten roped into this.<p>

Or at least he had wondered. However the second they had walked into this living nightmare, Prentiss had shown that she was quite the fan. Who would have guessed it? Bad-ass Agent Prentiss, a Doctor Who fanatic?

As they where making their way over to yet another booth, with Prentiss and Spencer chatting happily about the parallels between the Daleks and the Nazi's, Some tall, scrawny guy, scrawnier that Spencer even, walked past and cheered, "Hey, cool costumes! The quality's great!"

"Thank you." Enthused Spencer, before the kid walked off, waving to some woman who seemed to be some kind of feline alien in a nuns uniform. When he turned round, he noticed Spencer and Prentiss giving him an _'I told you so.' _look.

Aaron mustered up the most sincere smile he could, which wasn't actually that sincere at all and just thanked the heavens that Spencer hadn't picked out (as had been a stipulation of the wager.) a costume as bad as some of the ones around him.

Actually, away from this ridiculous setting, Aaron would have thought he looked pretty good. He was wearing a white plain tee with a black faux leather jacket and tight black jeans. Spencer had told him he was dressed as someone called Jack, then he had chuckled.

Spencer and Prentiss themselves weren't looking to bad.

Spencer was wearing a pinstripe suite and tie, with a beige trench coat and a pair of converse. His short hair had been ruffled into a spiky style. And Prentiss looked nice but very unlike herself in a red faux leather jacket and blue jeans with her hair twisted up into a style that reminded Aaron of a pineapple, tiny little gems where mixed in there too. Spencer was apparently The Doctor, or Ten as he had called him and Prentiss was a character named Martha.

_'Martha may not have been universally loved but she was a strong, capable character who deserves a lot more love than she gets.'_Prentiss had said indignantly when Spencer had asked if she was sure that was the character she wanted to emulate. His lover had backed down immediately, a wise move in Aaron's opinion.

As Prentiss engrossed herself in the merchandise for sale from the booth, Spencer turned to him and said, "You're hating this aren't you?"

"I have to admit, it's not as bad as I thought it would be." It was the most enthusiastic response Aaron could come up with, even if it was a lie, this was far worse that he had expected. And from the look on his face, Spencer knew that too.

But, Spencer had also trained with him several times in preparation for the marathon, and Aaron knew how much he hated that. So the least Aaron could do was try to act the part here today. After all, if he where really honest with himself, Spencer had probably, maybe won that game fairly. Maybe.

Spencer gave him a grateful smile and said, "Thank you for saying that, it's not much longer."

"Oh thank god." Aaron breathed in relief causing Spencer to chuckle.

"I. Am going to make this up to you. I booked us a room." Spencer said, stepping closer to him. They weren't concerned about Prentiss seeing them, the whole team knew.

"Is that right?" Aaron asked, swallowing the desire to drag his lover away to that room right that second.

"Mmm, hmm." Spencer hummed, fingering the zipper of his jacked. He looked up at Aaron, those wide, shining eyes filled with lust and promise, "On the other side of the hotel from Emily. So you can be as loud as you want." and leaned in to press a chaste to his lips.

Growling, Aaron pulled him closer and took his mouth in a passionate kiss.

They were about to get inappropriately lost in the kiss when some guy from the left of them said,

"Hey. You can't do that."

Aaron and Spencer parted, turning equally as indignant eyes on the young teen dressed in the same style as Spencer only less fetchingly and looking at them with disdain.

"Excuse me?" Aaron and Spencer turned their heads to see Prentiss stood with he hands on her hips, anger in her eyes.

Looking a little intimidated by Prentiss' glare, the kid continued none the less,

"It's just, Ten never kissed Jack, that was Nine!"

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><p><strong>Title:<strong> Magnificent

**Rating:** PG-13. Warning: Violence/Bullying.

**Prompt:** Hotch/Reid - Hotch is a college professor, Reid is his student

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><p>He knew the answer.<p>

Of course he knew the answer, he always did. That didn't mean Spencer Reid was in any way inclined to raise his hand. The young genius had learned long ago not to draw attention to himself like that. He got enough unwanted attention as it was.

Instead, Spencer focused not on the lesson being taught, the information of which he already knew, but rather on the man delivering said class. Mr Hotchner, Aaron as he insisted they call him, was the epitome of 'Tall, Dark and Handsome'. Short, almost jet black hair, deep, dark eyes and a firm jaw made him seem like the perfect man. Which of course meant that he had no idea Spencer existed.

So lost in his thoughts was Spencer that the sounding of the bell made him jump almost out of his skin and drew a few giggles from the students around him. Spencer sighed, college was supposed to be different than high school. But, it wasn't. He was still, after all, a 16 year old kid taking a third year course with a bunch 19/20 year old's. It turns out that, college or school, intellectual jealousy still won out over maturity.

So lowering his head and allowing his long hair to shield his face as usual, he stood and made his way out of the class, making sure not to accidentally knock into any of the others. The last thing he needed was to give any of them the perfect opening to start something.

Unfortunately, Edward James decided that he didn't need an opening.

"Hey, freak." He called. Spencer didn't even bother pretending not to know who he was talking about and instead just decided to ignore him, focusing instead on reading the flyers on the message board and praying that today was the day Edward decided to just leave him alone.

'Yeah right.'

"I said," He heard from behind him right before a hand shoved him between the shoulders and caused him to slam into his the wall with enough force to make him see stars, "Hey. Freak!"

Spencer still refused to turn around, especially now that he heard a few of the other students stood around them in the otherwise deserted hallway, laughing along.

Edward was apparently unhappy with this however and, grasping his shoulder in a bruising hold, forcibly spun him around. Spencer was a few inches taller that Ed but Ed was both older and ... wider.

"What do you want?" Spence asked, Spence always asked. He never got a straight answer.

"I want to know why your such a freak." Ed said, laughing, "I wanna know why you never talk to anyone? What you think you're better than us?"

"No." He replied, his voice small. He doubled over when Ed at that moment rammed his fist into Spencer's stomach. Coughing, he fell to his knee's with his arms wrapped protectively around his midsection.

"That's right, you're not. You," Ed hissed, moving closer until his face was mere inches away from Spencer's, "Are nothing but a. Fucking. Freak."

Spencer clenched his eyes shut in preparation for the punch he knew was coming but instead he heard the crowd watching Spencer's beat-down whisper and move away before he sensed Ed raise to stand before him.

"What the hell is going on here?" The voice was Mr Hotchner's 'Aaron's' and he sounded very angry. Opening his eyes, Spencer was relieved to see him directing that anger in a glare towards Ed.

"We're just playing around sir. Right Spence buddy?" Ed said, while looking at Spencer with a promise in his eyes that he didn't want to test.

"Yeah, just fooling around and I..I fell." He knew it was a weak excuse, especially since his voice still betrayed how winded the punch had left him.

Mr Hotchner wasn't fooled in the slightest. "Right, and I suppose you punching him in the gut was just a friendly greeting huh?"

As Ed floundered for an answer, Mr Hotchner cut off his attempts, and sneered at the jock, "Get out. Now. I'll be writing up a report about this."

Ed immediately shuffled down the hall, but not before shooting a glare, letting him know that even though he had played along, Spencer was going to be blamed for this.

_'Fantastic.'_

Moving to get to his feet, Spencer was surprised to feel two, strong arms encircle him and help him up. Turning in the almost embrace he came into eye-line with the Professors gaze. He prayed the man would put his sudden breathlessness down to the previous assault and not how warm and kind those chocolatey depths were up close.

"Thank you." He said, hoping his voice didn't sound to the teacher as weak as it had sounded to him.

Mr Hotchner _'Aaron, I've got to get out of the habit of calling teachers/professors Mr. and Mrs. This is why people consider you a child.' _didn't let go of him however and instead steered him back towards the now empty classroom.

"Take it easy, come sit down. A punch to the stomach as hard as that isn't easy to recover from." His voice was dripping with concern and care, so much so that it gave Spencer an irrational urge to cry.

"I'm kind of used to it." He regretted murmuring those words when it caused Mr .. Aaron to look at him with a slightly horrified expression.

Easing Spencer down into a seat on the front row, Aaron perched on the edge of his desk and looked at him, "This happens a lot? Why don't you report it?"

Spencer couldn't answer that. He knew that he wouldn't understand.

He couldn't tell anyone because no-one would want to believe that the college football champion was capable of anything other than success, they would just think Spencer was an attention seeker. He couldn't tell anyone because there was only so much they could do and then Ed and all the others would just have something new to hold against him. Mostly though, he couldn't tell anyone because it was humiliating. How could he admit that he constantly just let these people corner him and do those things to him? How could he admit that there was nothing at all he could do to protect himself? How could he openly admit how weak he was? Failing to see a way to explain all this, Spencer just shrugged.

Sighing, Mr Hotchner looked down, clasped his hands together and gently said, "Your name's Spencer, right? Spencer Reid?"

Spencer had to admit he was surprised to find that the older man even knew he was in his class, much less his name. "Yeah." It must be because of my age.

Smiling slightly, Mr Hotchner asked, "Spencer, have you told your parents about this?"

_'I have a crush on a guy that sees me as a kid, fantastic.'_Putting that aside and taking a deep breath, Spencer began thinking of a convincing lie, one that would keep the man for asking again but just as he was, Aaron sighed.

"I'll take that as a no." He raised a hand to cut off Spencer as he began to protest, "I know that look, Spencer. I know when someone's going to lie to me."

Lowering his eyes guiltily, he wondered where his professor was going with this. It would seem, however, that he wasn't going to find out any time soon as the second bell ringing to alert him his next class was sounding.

Almost fainting with relief at having an excuse to get away from this conversation, one that was making him feel far too exposed, he practically tripped over himself trying to get out while muttering apologies. From Aaron's less than amused smile, it was clear the man knew how desperate Spencer was to get away. But he couldn't let himself care about that right now. He had enough problems to deal with.

He had to go home every night and care for a mentally ill mother and pray she hasn't hurt herself, he had a crush on a man more than double his age who asked if he had gone crying to his mommy when people were mean to him, a bully probably planning his demise and a paper due in an hour. If he ever wanted to get out of this place, he couldn't be late with any papers.

As much as he wanted to believe that the bullying was the only reason he wanted to leave so badly, he couldn't deny that every time he saw Aaron, it just reminded him that he was probably going to be alone forever.

As he was leaving, he heard Aaron's voice asking him to wait.

"Spencer, no matter what anyone says about you. You are magnificent. You have an amazing mind and," He said, lowering his voice to a whisper, "Don't tell anyone I said this, but you are going to go so much further than any of those idiots. You." He met Spencer's eyes with the most sincere and caring expression the young man had ever seen, "Are going to change the world. I'm sure of it."

Struggling not to allow himself the indulgence of sharing Aaron's warm smile, knowing that he was probably only saying what his job obligated him to say, Spencer could only nod and turn to leave, still trying not to grin.

He failed.


	2. Stay Part 1

**Title:** Stay Part 1  
><strong>Pairing:<strong> Hotch/Reid  
><strong>Rating:<strong> PG-13  
><strong>Summary:<strong> Aaron has some news that Spencer doesn't want to hear. Drabble.  
><strong>AN: **Part 2 in next chapter. :D

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><p>"I don't understand? Why is this such a problem now?" Spencer asked, exasperated and trying very hard to ignore the increasing pressure in his chest.<p>

Aaron sighed and lowered his gaze, "Things are different now, it's complicated."

"Don't do that," Spencer hissed, "Don't talk to me like I'm a damn child. You've been telling me for months that you want to be with me, that you love me, that it's just a matter of time. And now you're ending it, just like that? I deserve a damn explanation."

Aaron raised his eyes now, "I'm not ending anything, of course I love you Spencer. You know that. We just have to be more careful now. I .. " scrubbing a hand over his eyes, he finally said, "Haley's pregnant."

Spencer felt like he'd been slapped.

_'We barely even speak anymore Spence, let alone anything else. I promise, I'm all yours.'_

Those had been the words his lover had spoken to him one night, while they where curled up together in some distant hotel room.

Spencer was certain that his anguish must have shone though his eyes when Aaron attempted to pull him into an embrace.

"Do _not _touch me," dammit he wasn't going to cry, he wasn't, "I said, after the first time we kissed that it didn't have to mean anything. _You_ kissed me again. I said, after the first time we slept together that it didn't have to change anything, _you _said you wanted things to change." Despite his best efforts, the tears fell now.

"I gave you every chance to walk away, but instead you stayed and made me fall in love with you." As tear stained eyes searched deep into guilt ridden ones, Spencer asked the most important question on his mind.

"Why?"

"Because," Aaron said, sounding broken, "I love you. I shouldn't but I do." He desperately reached out again. This time Spencer, seeing tears matching his own fall from the mans eyes, allowed himself to be drawn in, "I'm supposed to be a husband. I'm supposed to be a father. I'm supposed to be a leader. I can't be any of those when I'm with you but you are _all_ that I really want. Please, tell me you still want that. Still want us?"

Spencer looked into deep, imploring eyes and had to look away.

Disentangling himself from Aaron's arms, Spencer swiped at his eyes in a feeble attempt to make himself presentable to the people working outside the closed office door.

Taking a deep, shaky breath, Spencer whispered, "I still do. But I don't know if I _can _anymore."

And, gathering all his strength, Spencer forced himself to leave, and forced himself to ignore the pained sob he heard behind him.

tbc.


	3. Stay Part 2

**Title:** Stay Part 2: It's All Coming Back To Me Now.  
><strong>Disclaimer: <strong>Not mine, no profit made.  
><strong>Rating:<strong> FRT  
><strong>Pairing:<strong> Hotch/Reid  
><strong>Summary:<strong> It's been four years. It shouldn't still hurt this much. Sequel to Stay.

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><p>Aaron was sat on his couch, head in his hands, in his darkened living room when he heard the firm yet low knock at the door. He decided that whoever it was could wait until he was a little more suited to entertaining guests.<p>

_'Like when I have a greater handle on whether or not I want to go our and shoot someone else or stay here and shoot myself.'_

However, when he heard a key turn, he knew it was one of the team. Haley was in Florida with Jack on vacation and she wasn't likely to just drop by his apartment anyway. If he wanted to see Jack, he had to go to _her._

He had been expecting a sarcastic comment from Dave or even a smooth joke from Morgan. What he hadn't been expecting was a soft, familiar voice calling his name.

Aaron's brow furrowed from the pain that shot through his chest every time he was blind-sided by Spencer's voice. Even after all this time.

Spencer hadn't come back to him after he found out about Haley's pregnancy. Aaron had hoped to spur a reaction out of him when he revealed that he and Haley were getting a divorce. But his curt reply had made it clear that, as he'd said, he wasn't going to get what he wanted. What he _truly _wanted.

Aaron felt the cushion of the sofa shift as Spencer sat next to him.

"Are you okay?" When Aaron didn't answer, he continued, "This case ... it wasn't your fault. You couldn't have taken the deal Hotch. It wouldn't have been right."

Spencer sounded so tender, so caring. But the use of his nickname was like a punch in the gut. He used to call him Aaron. Used to cry out his name in pleasure. Now he was, once again, just Hotch.

He didn't know how to handle this right now, it was like all of this was so much more raw in the face of what he was already feeling from Foyet situation. It was too much.

Spencer had asked about the case, but Aaron couldn't think about that. He didn't want to.

"Four years." He said simply.

The quiet inhalation next to him was proof enough that Spencer knew exactly what he was talking about, still he said it, "It's been four years since we've been alone together outside of work."

"I know." Spencer whispered. They where still sat side by side, not looking at one another. It seemed so wrong.

It didn't make sense, they'd been apart a lot longer than they'd been together but this, this separation, still didn't feel natural to Aaron. He longed with every fiber of his being to reach out, take hold of the man he loved and never let go. But Aaron had lost the right to do that a long time ago.

"You know what's terrible?" He asked, unable to stop himself from speaking. He felt as though the cumulative effects of the case, his divorce, the custody battles and his loneliness had drained him of the strength needed to fight.

"I see you, and this thought comes into my head. I can't stop it. It says 'We can be together now, Haley's gone.' It comes every time."

Spencer's voice was low and pained, "Hotch."

There it was again.

"I know. I know I lied to you, I hurt you. I made promises I couldn't keep and you can't trust me enough to love me again. I know that. I hate it, but I know."

More silence.

Aaron stood up, he needed to move. It was as though he could feel four years worth of pain coming to the surface again after being suppressed for so long. He covered his eyes with his hand when he felt tears prickling.

He heard Spencer stand and for a moment, Aaron was certain he was leaving. Instead, he felt arms wrap around him, he felt a warm body against his and he smelled Spencer. He smelled just as he had all the many nights they had spent together. Aaron lost control of his tears. He clung to Spencer, sweet, amazing, perfect Spencer and sobbed. Because there really was nothing left for him to do.

His former lover whispered soothing words to him and held him tight as he cried.

Spencer took a deep breath, "I couldn't … anymore, I just … God, I never stopped loving you Aaron."

His breath caught in his throat. Aaron, he'd called him Aaron. And he still loved him. It was too much for Aaron to take. Knowing that it wasn't fair, that it wasn't wise, he turned his head slightly to nuzzle Spencer's neck, inhaling the scent of his long, shaggy hair before pressing a soft kiss to the soft, smooth skin.

Spencer gasped. Aaron kissed him again, firmer this time. He didn't miss the way Spencer's head inclined ever so slightly to the side to grant Aaron access.

"Aaron." It was as much a breathy moan as a protest.

Snaking his tongue out to taste the slightly salty skin, Aaron felt as though a fire was burning through his body. He began pressing open mouthed kisses to Spencer's neck and shoulder, sucking ever so lightly as he went. Spencer was gasping and arching slightly into the touch, small moans and hums making their way to Aaron's ears and making him dizzy.

He tightened his arms around the slim waist and pulled the man even closer to him. Aaron kissed along Spencer's sharp jawline, savoring the feel of light stubble beneath his lips. He hummed against the skin and finally pulled away, lifting his head to hover his lips millimeters from Spencer's.

He could taste Spencer's breath as he panted a little and he couldn't wait any longer.

He leaned in and pressed his lips against Spencer's. So full and soft. Aaron was back in the Tennessee hotel room, almost five years ago. Their first kiss. It had been as close to heaven as Aaron had gotten in years.

And now he felt like he was experiencing that bliss all over again when Spencer threaded his fingers through his short hair and pressed his tongue to Aaron's lips. The sudden sensation of Spencer's taste once again in his mouth, his tongue stroking across his own, was enough to make his knee's weak.

Thankfully, Spencer tightened his hold and pushed them up against a wall, pressing his whole body against Aaron's, trapping him in a way he never wanted to end.

Lost in his arousal, Aaron thrust his hips, moaning loudly when his erection brushed against Spencer's. He felt the other man press harder into him and whimper. It was so intoxicating to know that Spence still wanted him.

But apparently 'want' wasn't enough for his former lover, because he pulled away with a frustrated growl.

"Dammit Aaron, you can't do that. It's not fair." He cried.

Aaron forced himself to ignore how beautiful Spencer looked, his lips swollen and hair messed. Instead, still leaning heavily against the wall, he whispered, "I know."

Breathing deeply and pacing back and forth, Spencer yelled, "Do you know where I was going tonight? Before I had the brilliant idea to come here? I had a date."

_Aaron's eyes flew up then, he felt as though he had been shot. _

__'Four years, Aaron. Did you really expect nobody to see how amazing he is?' __

_"The first date I've been able to make since we... He's really nice Aaron. He really likes me. We .."_

_"Please." Aaron begged in a small voice, holding back tears. He couldn't hear this._

_He watched as Spencer's face tensed with the strain of maintaining his composure. He eventually gave up and pressed his hands to his face, shaking his head._

_"You can't do this," He mumbled again, "Do you have any idea how small you made me feel, how dirty. I just .." _

_Aaron broke._

_"I know, I know I'm being unfair but I can't do this any more. I can't see you and work with you and pretend I'm not empty inside. You were the only thing I ever wanted that I shouldn't. The only thing I ever allowed myself to have when I knew it was unfair, for both you and Haley. _

_Taking a deep breath and trying not to fall to his knee's, he continued "I spent my whole life trying to be perfect for everyone, just like my father had expected me to be. I had it beaten into my head long ago that men where expected to act certain ways and you, the way I felt about you, contradicted all that." He pushed away from the wall, took hold of Spencer's wrists and urged him to lower them. The pain he was greeted with made him feel sick with himself._

"I know that's not an excuse. I know I can never take back what I did, how I hurt you. But I ... I can't believe I ever thought I could live without you. I need you, Spencer. I need to touch you, to kiss you. I need to hold you and tell the whole world you're mine. I don't care about anything, what people think, what rules it breaks, nothing. But you."

Forcing himself to step away, Aaron closed his eyes for what felt like the hundredth time and said blankly, "But if you can't ever be with me, I understand. Just, please tell me you can understand that I never used you. I never wanted to be the thing that hurt you."

There was what felt like hours of sharp, torturous silence. He knew he didn't deserve forgiveness, but to just have Spencer in his life again, some kind of interaction other than the brutal formality they'd settled for. He'd rather have him in his life and not be able to have him close, than not have him at all.

Suddenly he heard Spencer sniff, he dared not open his eyes.

"God damn you." He whispered.

He barely had time to open his eyes before he felt fingers in his hair and then, Spencer was kissing him.

The joy that exploded in Aaron's chest was beyond measure. His breath hitched into the kiss and his whole body shook.

He held onto Spencer so tight he was sure he was causing him pain but he couldn't let go. Not after all this time. Not now that he finally had the man he loved back in his arms.

Their lips and tongues moved together messily, desperately, until finally they needed air.

"Spencer." Aaron breathed reverently. He could think of no other words. Nothing in the world mattered beyond the man in his arms.

"Aaron," The sadness in Spencer's tone caused Aaron to frown, "How do I know you mean it this time? How can I trust you again?"

Resting his forehead against Spencer's, Aaron spoke quietly, afraid of breaking this spell.

"Because I've spent almost half a decade living without you. I know how empty it is, I'm never going to risk that again."

He heard Spencer breath heavily, "God, half a decade. I can't believe it's been _that_ long. I also can't believe it's _only_ been that long."

His lips curling into a rueful smile, Aaron nodded, "I don't ever want to be without you for that long again."

Spencer bit his lip, "Aaron .. " He said hesitantly.

He immediately saw his mistake, "I know. Sorry, I'm getting ahead of myself. But, you're erm," He was suddenly very nervous, "You're open to trying?"

Spencer searched Aaron's eyes for something. Whatever it was, he found it because after a few tense seconds, he nodded.

Before he let the relief wash over him, Aaron needed to be certain, "You're sure this is what you really want. I don't think I could handle getting my hopes up if not."

At that, Spencer chuckled slightly, "Aaron, the first time I've visited you in a personal capacity since we ended things, just happens to be on the night of the first date I've had since then? I'm pretty sure this was what I wanted before I even realized it."

Now, Aaron allowed himself to smile. Because this could actually happen.

This would happen.

Because Spencer was cautious, understandably, but Aaron was going to spend every spare second he had showing this amazing man how precious he was to him. He was going to make sure Spencer never doubted him or his devotion ever again.

He kissed him again, savoring the taste. He felt waves of desire wash over him and, almost without realizing, so lost was he in the familiarity of it all, he deepened the kiss and pressed their bodies closer.

"Stay. Please." He whispered against Reid's lips.

"No. I can't. We should go slow." Spencer said, not moving away from the embrace.

Aaron understood, and moved back slightly. "I know. Sorry. But, please just stay with me. I want to wake up with you. I just want to sleep in the same bed as you again. Nothing more."

Spencer smiled, lowered his head and nodded.

Taking hold of his lovers hand, and damn it felt good to be able to call him that again, he led him into the bedroom. Spencer had never seen this room before, so he took a second to look around.

"You like it?" He asked with hidden nerves. He had know at the time that it was wrong, creepy and extremely unhealthy, but Aaron had decorated this room with Spencer's tastes in mind. He'd just wanted to feel closer to him.

"I do." The genius answered, looking at Aaron as though he knew exactly what he'd done.

Aaron smiled shyly, embarrassed, before stripping off his suit jacket and moving to unbutton his shirt. He stopped short however when he realized Spencer might be uncomfortable.

"Erm, sorry. I'll go the bathroom." He said, grabbing his night clothes off the dresser.

Spencer giggled, actually giggled, said, "Aaron, you can change in front of me."

Aaron laughed at himself because, really, he was so overwhelmed by all this that he really didn't know what to do with himself. He was floundering and Spencer was acting like it was a relief not to be the one at a loss for once.

It was all very playful. Aaron felt like he could stay in this moment forever.

So they dressed for bed, Spencer in borrowed sweats and his undershirt, Aaron in his usual plaid bottoms and FBI shirt. Though he changed without a problem, he averted his eyes from Spencer, not wanting to push anything.

When they crawled into bed, they laid on their sides, propped up on their elbows and faced one another.

They both burst into laughter. Neither knew what to do now.

Spencer stopped laughing first, bit his lip and placed a hand on Aaron's chest; pushing him down. Then, shuffling over, he laid his head on Aaron's shoulder and placed an arm around his waist.

This is how they used to fall asleep after making love and Aaron felt pure emotion fill his chest.

"I love you Spencer. I'm going to spend my whole life showing you that. I swear." He was speaking quietly, almost whispering.

Nuzzling his face into Aaron's neck, Spencer whispered back, "I may just hold you to that."

End.


	4. Rainy Day's and Chocolate Chips

**Title:** Rainy Day's and Chocolate Chips.  
><strong>Disclaimer:<strong> Not mine, no profit made  
><strong>Rating:<strong> PG  
><strong>PairingCharacters**: Hotch/Reid, Jack Hotchner  
><strong>Summary:<strong> A rainy day in the Hotchner houshold.  
><strong>Prompt:<strong> Domestic Bliss. Just something fluff and domestic between these two. Bonus points and cookies if Jack is involved.

* * *

><p>"I wanna put marshmallows in!" Jack exclaimed, happily mixing batter. He was stood before the counter in the kitchen, covered in flour and standing on a stool that Spencer had spent ten minutes making sure was sturdy enough.<p>

"Marshmallows require an incredible small amount of heat to melt. By the time the cookies are finished, the marshmallows would be burned." Spencer answered patiently. He had suggested making cookies to distract Jack from Aaron, who had been swamped with paper work in the aftermath of Strauss departure.

And a bored child on a rainy weekend was not something that mixed well with concentration. So Spencer had made them, Aaron included, pancakes, took Jack first to the park, then to the grocery store. They had stopped off at a Wendy's for lunch before heading back. Aaron had barely worked though half of what he had to do.

He winced in sympathy for a second before being drawn back to the task at hand.

Jack frowned for a second before asking, "But doesn't chocolate only need a little bit of heat to be melted?"

Spencer's eyebrows raised at that. He never ceased being amazed by how smart and intuitive the little boy could be.

"Actually yes, but do you remember in the grocery store when I said we needed cooking chocolate?" Jack nodded, "Well here, taste it."

As Jack popped one of the chips in his mouth, he made a face, "It's different."

"Yeah. It melts differently than regular chocolate. It's mixed .." He paused. He was getting better at stopping his rants before the got to far, "It'll taste more like the cookies from the bakers."

Jack smiled widely and excitedly dumped the entire super size bag of chips into the batter, completely unconcerned that the bag was labelled as being suitable for up to 20 dozen batches.

Spencer smiled too. He had initially been surprised by how much fun he had with Jack, children usually hated him. But the littlest Hotchner was actually fascinated by the endless fountain of information that made up Spencer's personality.

"Wow! Those are going to be some chocolatey cookies." Said a deep, amused voice from the door way. Looking up and catching Aaron smiling at them contently, Spencer smiled back.

"Ah, why bother with 240 regular cookies when you can have 12 super-cookies?" He joked, laughing. Jack looked confused.

"Why are they super-cookies?" He asked innocently.

Without missing a beat, Spencer said "Because you made them."

Ruffling the boys hair, he instructed him to keep whisking and rounded the counter to press a chaste kiss to his lover's lips.

When Jack asked if he was doing it right, Spencer turned to inspect, he was, and sighed happily when Aaron wrapped his arms around his waist, resting his chin on his shoulder.

"You okay?" He asked, concerned. He knew that between Strauss' issues and Morgan's distrustful behaviour, his lover had been feeling the stress.

Aaron nuzzled Spencer's neck, sighing happily, "I just needed a break. You are so good with him."

Smirking a little, Spencer teased, "Funny, you don't sound surprised."

Aaron just chuckled and nuzzled him deeper. He was gently swaying them from side to side. Spencer was beyond content.

"Is there anything I can help with? Any standard forms I can do?" He asked, eager to lighten his partners burden.

Humming, Aaron answered, "Maybe tonight. Right now, you have cookies to attend to and I should really get back."

Spencer turned in Aaron's arms and stroked his thumbs over his lovers cheeks. "You are leaving that desk at ten and I'm going to make you forget what stress even feels like." He promised, with a salacious smirk.

"Now, there is an offer I can't refuse," Aaron smirked before lowering his smile into something more loving, "I don't think you understand how much easier all that tedium is knowing that you're here. Both of you."

Spencer could think of nothing to say, so instead, leaned in and kissed Aaron deeply. He felt a warmth in his chest when Aaron hummed into the kiss and stroked his hand down his back.

"Eww!" Jack squealed after a moment, causing both men to part, chuckling.

Giving one last smile to the two, flour covered males, Aaron turned and headed back to the boredom of his office.

Spencer returned to his post at the counter, noticing with amusement that Jack had managed to spill batter all over the edges of the bowl.

"Think they're gonna be good?" He asked.

Jack shrugged and, resorting to a 6 year old's logic, dipped his finger in a stuck it in his mouth. He raised his eyebrows and 'Mmm'd' appreciatively.

Statistics on the number of contagions that can be passed on through hands, an explanation on why uncooked batter wouldn't taste the same when cooked, and a list of the bacteria that could be thriving in the uncooked eggs , as well as a million other things, passed through Spencer's mind.

Pushing all of them aside, Spencer smiled widely, dipped in a finger of his own and stuck it in his mouth, delighting in the sounds of the child's laughter.

End.


	5. Three Rather Big Words

**Title:** Three Rather Big Words.  
><strong>Disclaimer:<strong> Not mine, no profit made.  
><strong>Rating:<strong> PG.  
><strong>Pairing:<strong> Hotch/Reid  
><strong>Prompt:<strong> The first time they say 'I love you.' (Doesn't have to be in response to one another.)  
><strong>AN:** This new HotchxReid Prompt Meme is going to be the death of me!

* * *

><p>The first time Aaron said 'I love you' had been in a hospital room. Jack had slipped off a small wall while in Spencer's care and had cut his head. When Aaron had seen how freaked out his lover was over such a superficial wound, refusing to calm even in the face of a smiling Jack happily munching on ice-cream; completely uninjured, the swell of emotion he'd felt had almost caused him to faint. He's said the words with a smile and followed them with a kiss.<p>

The fact that Spencer hadn't said it back didn't register until Aaron was trying to get to sleep that night. He looked next to him, taking in the sight of his lover quietly snoring away, and decided he didn't mind. Spencer had trust issues, understandable ones, and though he hadn't actually said the words, Aaron knew he loved him.

The thought was far from his mind when in Colorado working on a spree-killer case. They were surrounding the UnSub, who was hiding out in a shack in the middle of nowhere, surrounded on all sides by deep ravines and ditches. When the man made a run for it, he had shot blindly into the darkness. He just so happened, however, to shoot in the direction of Aaron's cover spot.

When the bullet hit his chest, he realized what an idiotic idea it had been to perch so close to the edge of one of the ravines. The force of the bullet pushed him back and he rolled down the hill. He stopped at the bottom and found he couldn't move. His Kevlar vest had caught the bullet, but the impact mixed with the fall, had knocked the air out of him and he couldn't draw in anymore, his body was rigid with pain.

A second later he heard Spencer calling his name, coming closer. He had been sat just off to the side and had clearly seen Aaron get hit. Just like with Jack, the knowledge that he was wearing Kevlar was doing nothing to ease the man's fear.

"Aaron, god please wake up. Move." He was frantic and Aaron wanted so badly to move, to comfort his lover, but he couldn't. His lungs were beginning to burn with the need for air.

"Aaron, please. You can't die, you can't leave me. I need you." He was now ripping at the vest and pulling on his tie, trying desperately to clear his airways.

"Please. I love you, I have to tell you that I love you. You can't die not knowing that please!"

The words coming from Spencer's mouth caused his chest to constrict in such a way that Aaron finally managed to cough, drawing in much needed air.

He heard, through the blood rushing in his ears, Spencer release a relieved laugh/sob. He felt fingers on his face and finally managed to open his eyes.

"I," He cleared his throat, "I swear I wasn't pretending to be dead to get you to say that." He croaked out, managing a small smile.

Spencer laugh/sobbed a little harder and lowered his head to rest on Aaron's chest. His hand, which had been resting on Aaron's waist, clenched and he fisted the loose material of his shirt. Aaron was certain the tears had won out over the laughter by now.

He reached a heavy arm up to touch Spencer's hair, unable to move enough to offer more assurance than that.

Spencer immediately raised his head, grabbed Aaron's face with both hands and kissed him hard. Aaron welcomed the feel of his lover's lips against his, taking comfort from them in the face of what could have been, had the bullet been mere inches higher, his death.

Spencer was still kissing him like crazy when they heard the rest of the team and a few LEO's running towards them. Spencer hesitantly released Aaron's lips and sat back, smiling.

Before they could reach them, Spencer whispered once more, "I love you."

Aaron smiled, used every ounce of strength he had to grasp his lovers hand and said, "I love you too.

End.


	6. Rules of Engagement

**Title:** Rules of Engagement  
><strong>Disclaimer:<strong> Not mine, no profit made  
><strong>Pairing:<strong> Hotch/Reid  
><strong>Rating:<strong> PG-13  
><strong>Prompt:<strong> Lyrics: Hotch/Reid, Cause there's a side to you that I never, never knew / All the things you'd say, they were never true, never true / And the games you'd play, you would always win, always win  
><strong>AN:** Short drabble set during/after Season 2 'Jones'

* * *

><p>"What's going on with you lately?" Aaron asked closing the hotel room door. he didn't have much hope of receiving a straight answer. He knew what it was effecting him, he knew what it all was. Aaron was a man who could tell when something was slipping away from him.<p>

"There's nothing going on with me Aaron." Spencer snapped back with a fake smile, "How about you huh? How's the family?" The vitriol in Spencer's voice struck Aaron like a fist.

"This isn't about me Spencer." Aaron said, deflecting away from himself regardless of how much of this he knew was about him, about what he asked of his lover. He took a deep breath, building up the courage to ask the question he really needed to, "Did you sleep with him? Your friend from the academy?""

Spencer froze where he stood before the dresser, his back straightened. When he turned, there was an expression on his face that held both anger and pain, "Yes."

Aaron closed his eyes at the blunt admission, he knew of course, but hearing it said with such spite hurt. It really fucking hurt. When he opened his eyes again, he was unsure what Spencer saw in them but he was certain in was betrayal.

"Did you sleep with her? Your wife?" Spencer spat back. He hated this because he didn't have an answer. Of course he slept with his wife but this, it was different. Wasn't it?

Aaron shook his head and placed his hands on his hips, "That's not the same." He wondered how he could convince his lover of that when he couldn't even convince himself.

Spencer scoffed at him, looking at him with contempt. It was then that Aaron's eyes where drawn downwards to Spencer's shaking hand. Following his gaze, Spencer saw it too, and with one more stern glare in Aaron's direction he grabbed his satchel, turned and headed for the door.

"Where are you going?" Aaron asked worridely.

"Out."

Aaron rushed forward and slammed a hand against the door before Spencer could open it, "Why? So you can shoot up?" He hissed.

Spencer turned in the small space between the wall and Aarons arm, a snarl on his face, "What the hell business is it of yours?"

Aaron frowned, "Of course it's my business."

"You set all the rules here Aaron so I'm going to hold you them. One, we're not in a relationship and two, when this door closes, you're no longer my boss. Right now you are nothing to me but an easy fuck so don't think you have a say in what I do or who I sleep with." Aaron was surprised by the bitterness is his lover's tone. He'd done this too him. Him and Hankel, together, had destroyed this once so peaceful and innocent man.

As Spencer geared up to continue, Aaron realized he could only stand here and take it, it was the least he could do, "You can feel free to change those rules anytime you like, I'll be waiting, I'm always waiting. On the sidelines,it's all I should have ever expected isn't it? The spare part, the consoltation prize? The dirty little secret?" Realizing he was close to tears, Spencer shook his head and said in a stronger voice, "But until you do, get the hell out of my way."

Sighing and lowering his head sadly, wishing there was something he could say to contradict him and keep him from doing what he knew he was going to do, he couldn't. He didn't have the right. With not a small degree of self loathing, Aaron kept his eyes closed as he lowered his arm and moved back.

He jumped when the door slammed close.

End.


	7. Pride

**Title:** Pride

**Disclaimer:** Not mine, no profit made

**Rating:** PG

**Summary:** Pride is important.

* * *

><p>Spencer looked out at the blurring landscape, thinking about Mr Corbett. He knew that it would take a lot more than a conviction, a token part of his daughter and a poem to bring the man peace. He knew it would take anybody suffering a loss more than empty words to find peace.<p>

Looking to his side, he attempted to asses Hotch inconspicuously. It was clear that when he'd asked about Mr Corbett's attempts at finding closure, he wasn't just talking about the grieving father. He'd been talking about himself, his divorce. His own loss.

He'd been surprised when Hotch had confided in him about his pending divorce but now, he felt as though he had an obligation to ensure that his boss, his friend, was okay.

"Hey," He said, realized he had a way to break the ice, "You were pretty awesome on the stand yesterday. I think that lawyer will think twice before questioning profiling again."

Chuckling lightly, Hotch said, "Sometimes they make it too easy."

Spencer nodded, laughing his agreement before realizing that his plan had failed; he still didn't feel comfortable asking the man if he was okay.

"I'm fine Reid."

Spencer's eyes widened and darted to Hotch. Had he said that out loud?

Seeing his shocked and confused expression, Hotch smiled somewhat sadly, "Lawyers aren't the only ones who make it easy sometimes."

Spencer was speechless. He supposed he could probably have been more subtle, what with his staring and long pauses. "Sorry."

Hotch's smile remained as he said, "That's okay. I'm ... not great. But, I'm okay."

"I'm glad. And it's clear that you haven't let it effect your work, we won this one pretty much entirely because of you." Pausing before saying what he really wanted to, he finally blurted out, "I'm proud of you." Closing his eyes, he winced. God, that was such a lame thing to say.

"Thank you." Hotch replied after a moment, tone ambiguous. His next words however where laced with meaning, "I'm proud of you too."

Spencer's brow wrinkled, "What for?"

Glancing at him for a moment before looking back at the road, Hotch said, "If I recall correctly, it was one year tomorrow that you asked me for a week off work for ... personal reasons."

Spencer's jaw dropped. He couldn't believe Hotch had remembered that. He'd barely remembered.

Hotch, correctly identifying Spencer's silence as shock, said, "I'm not about to forget something like that Reid. And I meant what I said, I'm proud of you, I know I couldn't have done that alone." His expression soured before he mumbled, more to himself that Spencer, "You shouldn't have had to do that alone."

As they stopped at a red light, Hotch took a deep breath and turned to him, "I'm sorry Spencer."

Caught off guard by both the guilty sorrow in Hotch's eyes and the use of his first name, Spencer simply said, softly, "You have nothing to be sorry for."

He meant that. Tobias may have injected him, but he was the one who chose to steal the drugs from his dead body. He was the one who chose to push the needle into his vein each time after that. Nobody was to blame for that but him and maybe Tobias at a stretch. Certainly not Hotch.

Turning back in his seat, Hotch sighed and tightened his grip on the steering wheel, "I have a lot to be sorry for."

Spencer knew that statement was about a lot more than his addiction but, just like back at the courthouse, he didn't know what to say to make him feel better. To assure him that everything would work out. To comfort him.

So he didn't say anything.


	8. Unexpected

**Title:** Unexpected

**Rating:** FRT

**Pairing:** HotchxReid

**Summary:** The thing Hotch expected least was his own reaction.

* * *

><p>Aaron hadn't expected much from a night out with the team. A few drinks, a laugh and much needed relaxation. What he hadn't foreseen was Morgan suggesting a drinking game involving modern pop culture references. He hadn't anticipated Reid losing and becoming extremely inebriated; though given the trivia topic, he probably should have. He certainly hadn't planned on his friendly gesture of driving Reid home to be followed by being roughly shoved up against his car the moment they were alone and kissed passionately.<p>

There was no way he could ever have anticipated that.

But the biggest surprise of the night was the white hot surge of arousal that shot through him when Reid's lean body pressed against his and the feel his soft lips. Without thinking, he wrapped his arms around the slim waist and pulled him even closer, deepening the kiss. He felt Reid's tongue press against his mouth and willingly parted his lips. When their tongues met and moved slowly, hotly, Reid moaned throatily.

The admittedly delicious sound was enough to pull Aaron from the heat enveloping him and remind him that he was currently taking advantage of his subordinate. No, his friend.

Tearing his mouth away with a gasp, shivering when Spencer whimpered in protest, Aaron breathed, "Reid. Stop."

Rather than stopping, Reid stroked his hands slowly down Aaron's chest, working them beneath his suit jacket and whispered, "I know you want me. I can feel it." Before pressing his thigh against Aaron's erection; proving his point.

Closing his eyes and holding back a groan, Aaron didn't pull away as he said, "I do. I do, but … you're drunk." He hated how incincere his protestations sounded, he should be more appaled by his desire.

Reid was biting down his neck, moving his thigh against Aaron's clothed cock and drawing embarrassing moans from him. "I'm not as drunk as you think."

Oh dear god how Aaron wanted to believe that. He felt a need to take the agent at his word, take him back to his apartment and throw him down onto his bed ….

"No. Stop." Aaron said firmly. The image of Reid in his bed had turned to a more realistic image of the genius sprawled, barely conscious on his mattress; helpless to deny what Aaron was about to do. That was enough to make him sick with himself.

Reid must have noted the tone because he finally moved away. He looked almost hurt as he mumbled, "I really do want you."

Aaron, feeling terrible on many levels, reached out to tame some of the longer strands of his hair that had blown astray, "I know. I want you too, but I want you. Sober." He moderated his tone, careful not ensure the drunk man he wasn't judging him.

Reid nodded, and then swayed as though the action had thrown his world off. "I'm really tired." His voice was soft, small. Aaron knew he'd made the right decision. Any other, pre-existing feelings notwithstanding, would have ruined their friendship.

Moving forward and taking the man in his arms, entirely platonically, Aaron whispered soothingly, "Come on. Let's get you home."


	9. Fantasy

**Title:** Fantasy

**Disclaimer:** Not mine, no profit made

**Rating:** PG-13

**Summary:** Spencer really should focus, despite how sexy his lover looks.

* * *

><p>Spencer Reid considered himself a man with a strong sense of priorities. He may not always act within the social bounds but he never felt he crossed the line of propriety.<p>

Which was why he was so dismayed by the fact that, in light of Emily returning, Hotch and JJ lying to the team and a small boys life in danger, he couldn't seem to tear his gaze away from Hotch.

He couldn't stop thinking about the potential feeling of the scratchy stubble across his cheek, his neck, his thighs. He couldn't resist fantasizing about biting along his lover's jaw and feeling the coarse hairs scrape beneath his teeth.

And he could not stop staring.

He was in the process of wondering what the short beard would feel like wet, in the shower, when he felt a small but sharp jab to his side. Turning a questioning frown back, he saw that is was Rossi who'd poke him.

"What?" He mouthed silently.

Rossi stepped closer under the guise of passing him, and whispered, "You're not being subtle kid. Tone it down and for god sake, grab a folder or something. You're tenting."

Reid's eyes widened and a blush marred his cheeks.

'Oh god.' He thought, moving to stand behind a high backed chair. Looking around to make sure nobody else had seen what Rossi had seen, he was glad to see that none of them seemed to be paying attention to him. Everyone was completely focused on the case.

'As you should be' his mind provided.

However, when he turned his eyes to Hotch, he saw his lover was looking at him. He wasn't smiling but Reid knew him well enough by now to see the sparkle in his eyes. The promise.

Reid had to fight a smirk when he realized what that promise meant. He was able to get back to business then, comfortable in the knowledge that, later tonight, he'd no longer have to imagine what that scruff would feel like against his skin.

He'd know.


End file.
